"The Parable of the Playroom"

So for those of you who know me...you know I don't like to attempt difficult things. I'd just rather not even try, then to try and fail. Which is why ever room in my house (especially the ones with cool paint jobs) have been done mostly by my mom. I just watch and help with the easy stuff.

So when this playroom idea came about and I realized I was going to have to do this on my own, I was pretty nervous. I knew I wanted to do it while Danny was gone so that I could just focus on it and not have to worry about anything else.

Also...for a very long time I've basically looked at my mother as my "earthly Holy Spirit". I'm sure anyone with very godly parents understands what I mean. I've always used her "approval" as my own. I've known that wasn't right, but it was a habit I had started and one I didn't feel like breaking to be honest. With everything going on I knew one of the lessons God was teaching me was that I was now going to HAVE to depend fully on Him and not use my mom as my "safety net" if you will. I'll be honest, I really don't like having to learn these lessons this way.

That's how these 2 stories come together....

Wednesday morning as I was moving furniture out of the playroom I just began praying and asking God to have mercy on me...and make this job go smoothly. I told Him that He knew my personality and that I was having a difficult time knowing my mom wasn't going to be able to be a part of it and could He just make this a learning experience in all kinds of areas for me. Day 1 went right on schedule, one little snafu, but nothing that couldn't be fixed. My parents did come over Thursday and my mom tried her best to help tape some lines, but after 2 she just couldn't. I knew she wanted to be a part, but she just physically can't do things. I did so enjoy having her there though to be a part of it.

It really wasn't until Friday afternoon as I was painting the 2nd set of stripes that I even realized how smoothly this whole process had gone. Linda had taken Ansley all day Friday and Zach was in the middle of a 4 hour nap!!! I had time to finish everything and get it all cleaned up before he got up. I was on cloud nine...seriously!

It was so neat to me that God had used something purely physical and unimportant (the painting of a room) to show me that He was going to be my Helper, the one I could depend on for everything. Now believe me, I know there are going to be times here soon where I'm feeling lost without my mother, but God is already preparing my heart... I know it. He's gently telling me (and proving) that He loves me, everything about me. He made me just for this situation so of course He is going to take care of me through it, if I let Him. He gave me the most wonderful mother in the world. A woman who has raised me to love Jesus more than anything. My heart's desire is to love Him as much as she does. I could never express the wonderfulness that she is. She has taken care of me in every single aspect of my life. But now I need to truly let my Father do that, as I should have been all along.

Anyway, not sure if I'm expressing it how I really want to...but I love finding little "parables" or metaphors in life that can apply spiritually.

Here are some pics of the transformation. Still have some finishing touches of course :)

Before:

 Doing the work:

 After!!!:

Even in laughter the heart may ache, and joy may end in grief.

Proverbs 14:13

"Stepping Up"

At the beginning of Summer the Holy Spirit laid on my heart to do this Beth Moore study. I hoped the church owned it so I could do it myself this summer. They didn't, which was fine.

After some things transpired I am now facilitating this class on Monday nights. IT IS AWESOME!!! I can't even describe it. I soooooooooooo know why God wanted me to do it now :) I love how He works things out better than we could ever imagine.

It's very different than any of her other studies I've done. So much more real reflection and seeing how you can apply each Psalm to your own personal situation. The Word of God is truly alive!!

Refreshed!

I've spent the last 2 days being pampered and waited on while sitting in a beautiful home at the beach and learning more ESL training. It has been so wonderful getting to know these women...particularly the women that I will be assisting this year. I'm so excited to be a part of this organization and am so humbled to be in the company of these people. I actually feel so ridiculously unqualified...these women have either been teaching forever, been missionaries to everywhere...OR BOTH!!! I've battleled a little bit with regretting how much of my life has been wasted. I know there is no point in that though.

Anyway, so excited about this new adventure...and so scared too!!!!

"wuv....twoo wuv"

We had a marriage seminar at our church last night with Kirk Cameron and Warren Barfield. It was wonderful! There wasn't a bunch of ground breaking information or anything, but it is always so good to be reminded about Who created marriage and what marriage is for. It always makes me feel closer to Danny somehow.

Warren told the story about how he wrote "Love is Not a Fight". Unfortunately I could so relate to that story. Danny and I don't fight like that often, but we have a few times and it is so devastating. I so appreciated Warren's honesty at sharing something so personal. I know how embarrassed I feel after a fight like that and I wouldn't want anyone to know the things we have said to each other.

My favorite lyric from that song has always been, "and if we try to leave may God send angels to guard the door". He talked about how he told his wife he was leaving that night of the argument but how grateful he was that God had sent angels to guard the door that night. It was so beautiful and I'll never listen to that song the same way again.

I'm so grateful for a husband who is trying sooooooooooooo hard to be the man God wants him to be. No, he's not perfect. But his hearts desire is to be all that God has for him and I'm so blessed to have him in my life. I know I don't tell him that enough. Shame on me.

Anyway, it was a great night!!

He's working it out...

It's pretty cool to see how God works out all the little details. Even the ones that frustrate and annoy you. I think this new venture with the Women's Bible Study is going to be interesting. It may not work, but at least we can say we tried!!