It's that time of year again.

Time for looking back, while at the same time looking ahead.

I feel like it's been a long time since I've spent this much time thinking about the past year and the upcoming year. Not sure why. Maybe because 2013 was such a rollercoaster of...well, everything.

I've gone from being lonely, depressed and uncertain of my future to seeing God restore a relationship I wasn't sure could every be made whole again. I've been on the high of hearing from the Lord on a hilltop in Caenarfon, Wales to ancient wounds in my heart being revealed a day later sitting around a dining table in Wales. I spent several months eargerly digging into a book of the Bible that spoke to me so profoundly to ONCE AGAIN letting the enemy steal the joy and peace of the Christmas season away from me. Up and down. Up and down...

Up and down.

I wish I could say I was starting out 2014 on an up, but I think I'm still more in the "down" category. I can't exactly figure out why - other than the fact that my failures keep bubbling to the surface. Faillure is probably my biggest fear and it's what the devil usually attacks me with. It's pretty cool that the next person in the Bible I will be studying is Gideon.

...

Back in my 20's I always made New Year's Resolutions. Always. I would print them out and tape them to my computer at work so I could see them. The problem was that I was ALWAYS trying to do them in my own power. I've been thinking for a few weeks about my "goals" or "resolutions" for 2014 will be. I've had lot's of different thoughts. But they all come down to basically this:

Speak less, listen more. 

Now, if you know me - you know that won't exactly be a walk in the park. This is something that I know is necessary for me to grow spiritually. (The only caviat is that I do need to talk to God more, but I also need to listen morer - I know that's not a word, just being silly). I have ideas of what I think God might be doing in my life and things He might want me to do. But I'll never get there if I don't learn to just shut up.

I say all this to so that you can help me. Kthnxbye :)